Shit Just Got Real

A few months ago I wrote a post about how I wanted to move to London. Guess what?

We’re doing it!


Now, this wasn’t an easy process to go through. We had our wedding in June, which came with a load of pressure and stress from planning our big day. Although we’d previously decided that we wanted to go overseas, we fell in love with some house plans and got ourselves seriously sidetracked – perhaps this can be referred to as good ol’ fashioned procrastination? Eeek.

We somehow found ourselves signed up with a local building company, we’d picked our plot of land, selected all of the things we wanted in our dream house, we told everyone that we were building a house and we even paid a deposit. What the hell, right? We were really slipping into the married life cliché that we wanted to avoid and the plans to travel were rapidly disappearing out of our minds. 

Fast forward to August. Our quote for the build came back at Five. Hundred. Thousand. Dollars. In short; we noped the fuck out after we calculated that our mortgage repayments/house expenses would be $1100 a fortnight for the next 30 years. Sure, we’re fortunate enough that we could afford it in our current situation, but we’d never be able to have kids or take a holiday without seriously struggling to stay afloat. That’s not the kind of life I want to live and it definitely doesn’t align with my desire to explore the world. 

After we recovered from the near death experience of $500,000 in debt, we jumped online and literally brought the latest possible flights to London for 2018 that we could. Remember that indecisive shit that I do? I didn’t wanna risk ANOTHER change of mind and having yet another plan that we’d never follow through with. We’re now $2500 deep in airfares so theoretically there’s no turning back.

Where to from here? Well, we’re almost finished with those pesky renovations that we’ve been struggling to complete and we’re going to rent our house out as soon as they’re done. We’re moving into Todd’s mums house so that we can save as much cash as we can until we leave NZ (keep an eye out for a post about our budget and savings plan) and my Dad has offered to care for the dogs while we’re away. I’m becoming an expert lurker on all things London related, Kiwis in London/Kiwis in London Chat are possibly my most visited Facebook pages and r/London keeps me in awe most nights.  I have to keep a very exciting secret from my colleagues and employer which I can’t let slip for another 8 months or so. 

It’s all getting very real and extremely scary. 

If you’ve made the leap I’d love to hear your thoughts on savings, job opportunities and any regrets you may have. Did it all work out for you?

Shayla xx

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The untold

 

The risk I took, I never told. 

A few years ago I let go of my biggest fear of my life. As a child I had a traumatic experience that involved a cliffe, rocks and deep cold water. You are going to think I am crazy. I did the one thing they tell you not to do- trigger bad memories on purpose. I fronted up to my fear and to my memory.

I went back to where it all happened. Some days it took me time to get out of the car. Some days I forced myself out and others I did a circle and drove home again. For those days that I made it out of the car I walked up to the edge of the cliffe and took a seat. With no-one around me all I could hear was the sound of the waves crash against the rocks. Talk about triggering a memory. There was mini panic attacks, loads of tears and some screaming but I did it. At 20, going on 21, I was able to walk up to that cliffe and breathe normally. The fear was gone. The memory, not so much, but hey least I was not afraid anymore.

Would a councillor have told me to face my trauma, no. Would my family and friends support you, probably not.  Did I take a risk, yes.

Lesson learnt: They will call themselves experts but the councillors, parents and friends in your world do not understand you like you. Make your own decisions for a better you.

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